Unfettered love.
This is what people really mean (or at least should mean) when they praise “unconditional love.”
Love that is unfettered—and enduring. Not unconditional.
Because in order for any love to thrive in a healthy way, certain agreements with regards to mutual respect and beneficial behavior must be embraced, thereby making that love *conditional* on honoring that sacred trust.
A love that comes with honorable conditions is like having a relationship that comes with healthy boundaries. No love or relationship can thrive properly without them. Otherwise the relationship is bound to be toxic and harmful.
So yes, unfettered love—and enduring love—let’s embrace that.
Unfettered means you give your loved one permission to be free…
Free to embrace who they are deep inside.
Free to do what they genuinely believe is best for their life and soul.
With no emotional chains, shackles, or nooses that stunt their personal or spiritual growth.
With no fetters aimed at manipulating them into being who *you* want (or demand) them to be.
But “unconditional love”? Nah.
God, protect us.
Too much emotional manipulation and spiritual abuse occurs when we are led to believe we must (or should) “unconditionally” love someone—or that someone must “unconditionally” love us—with no conditions at all in how that relationship should look or feel to us. With no boundaries in what we should or should not accept from the one we imagine unconditionally loves us.
Love yourself enough to see honorable *conditions* as not only a good thing, but also a necessary part of any relationship—and as the very essence of true love.
Conditions and boundaries are your right. Don’t let anyone tell you different, no matter how praiseworthy and honorable they paint “unconditional love” to be.
When love is an action word—as true love always is—then there must be *conditions* of respect, compassion, and genuine support of each other’s emotional and spiritual health. There must be the *condition* of genuinely embracing your loved one’s freedom to exist as a whole person outside of and separate from you.
And there must be the *condition* of sincerely and humbly unfettering your loved one from the shackles of what you imagine they owe you…just because God was gracious enough to gift them to you during your brief sojourns on earth.
So embrace the beautiful side of conditional love:
Unfettered and enduring love.
God-willing, it will set you free.
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